Dear American Apparel website,

Just a quick line to say thanks. Thanks for the good times we had when I was lonely and the baseball game was getting kinda boring, and I had somehow got sick of the more explicit websites I so often turn to in times like these. It feels good to know that nobody had to work in a sweatshop to make those clothes which in turn made it so nobody had to get quite all the way naked to show me a good time on your internets. Thanks for having a weird and creepy guy who runs your company and makes this all so... probable (in the words of Alex Chilton).

Sincerely,
Matty Lite

MWF 10-11

Music Theory I

Prerequisite: something to do rather than pay attention to the class you've TA'd for like thirty times.

Recommendation: start drawing a comic using characters created in your youth.

Materials: pencil, paper, artistic skills that have not changed since the third grade.

Schedule: one strip per class meeting.

Grading: how bad you want that A, there, Ms. Palm?