Thursday, August 23, 2012

Fuck meat and cheese slices

Just don't even tell me about your meat and cheese if it's not in cube form. Just stop. I don't wanna hear it. I don't care about your flimsy little "slices." Get real. For real. Come on. Cubes! Cubes! Cubes! Shut up. Quit it. Did you know it's good luck if your Swiss cheese cube is cut in just such a way as to avoid hole-age on all six facets? Thus preserving ideal and unblemished cubicity? True. Now get those slices outta my face and come talk to me when you go cube, cuz I don't wanna hear it. We live in a 3-D world, & I'm eatin' my meat and cheese in 3-D. I mean, at least. Who knows what dimensions are curled up real small inside there. I mean, I don't wanna limit myself. When they start selling meat and cheese hypercubes I will be the first in line. Except it won't be line any more, it'll be plane. Everything that you used to wait in line for you will wait in plane for. And every occasion where you used to make a point, you will deliver a line. But these are just dreams of tomorrow. For now we live in a 3-D damn world and I say fuck your slices, gimme the cubes.

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